Hi there,
The constant desire to please others at the expense of one’s own needs can lead to a detrimental outcome – burnout.
Professionals who habitually prioritize others over themselves are particularly susceptible to burnout.
People pleasers often carry a relentless need for approval from others.
This deep-seated desire for external validation, whether it is stem from early childhood experiences or societal expectations, can lead to burnout.
In most cases, their behaviors are often tied to a sense of duty or the belief that one’s worth is contingent upon being indispensable.
The constant fear of disapproval drives people pleasers to go above and beyond to gain acceptance at the expense of their own health.
The mindset of someone who is a people pleaser is like this: “In the pursuit to win everyone over, it is okay to lose myself.”
When you are a people-pleaser, getting burned out is just a matter of time.
People with this tendency usually don’t speak up when they’re overloaded.
In some extreme cases, they continue offering help and accepting more responsibilities voluntarily!
Their tendency is well-meaning but their deep-rooted need for other people’s approval eventually burns them out, compromises their health, makes them unable to do anything, and causes other people’s disapproval at the end.
After the fall, they rest up, recover, and start all over again.
The most intriguing piece is that people with this tendency are usually well aware that they’re playing a losing game, but they keep playing.
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7 Reasons Why Being a People Pleaser Leads to Burnout
1. Difficulty Saying NO
One hallmark of people-pleasing behavior is the inability to say ‘no.’
They usually have this deep-rooted fear of disappointing others or being perceived as uncooperative.
As a result, they consistently overcommit to tasks and responsibilities, leaving little room for self-care and recharging activities.
Their difficulty in setting boundaries becomes a significant contributor to burnout.
People pleasers find themselves stretched thin, juggling numerous obligations without the ability to prioritize their own well-being.
This chronic overextension leads to emotional and physical exhaustion aka. burnout.
2. Fear of Conflict
People pleasers often avoid conflict at all costs.
They tend to avoid the dread of negative emotions, confrontation, or the possibility of being disliked.
As a result, they tend to suppress one’s true feelings and opinions to maintain a facade of harmony.
Suppressing feelings and avoiding necessary confrontations can lead to a build-up of emotional tension, ultimately fueling burnout.
3. Neglecting Self-Care or Recharging Activities
People pleasers often prioritize the needs of others to the detriment of their own well-being.
They usually tend to think that self-care is perceived by others as selfish.
Neglecting personal needs creates a vulnerability to burnout.
The constant focus on external validation and serving others leaves people pleasers with little energy for themselves.
This neglect can lead to physical health issues, heightened stress levels, and ultimately, burnout.
4. Perfectionistic Tendencies
People pleasers often carry perfectionistic tendencies.
In their mind, flawless performance is necessary to gain approval and maintain relationships.
As a result, they experience the persistent fear of making mistakes or falling short of expectations.
Perfectionism contributes to burnout by creating an unrealistic standard that is impossible to sustain.
The constant pressure to meet these high expectations, coupled with the fear of failure, can lead to chronic stress and emotional exhaustion.
5. Difficulty Receiving or Giving Feedback
People pleasers often struggle to receive or give criticism, viewing it as a personal attack rather than feedback.
They look at each feedback as a sign that shows how much they disappoint others, or they are being perceived as inadequate.
People pleasers may also resist giving feedback to their team members, fearing it may jeopardize their relationships.
The avoidance of constructive feedback or criticism contributes to burnout by limiting opportunities for learning, improvement, and prevention.
This reluctance to receive or give feedback can contribute to burnout.
6. Constant Comparison to Others
People pleasers often engage in constant comparison to others, measuring their worth based on external benchmarks.
They may have this belief that being “better” than others is necessary for acceptance.
This chronic state of comparison usually leads to constant feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt.
The constant comparison to others contributes to burnout by perpetuating a cycle of insecurity and anxiety.
7. Lack of Self-Advocacy
People pleasers often lack the ability to advocate for their own needs and desires.
They may fear that asserting oneself may lead to conflict or rejection.
Therefore, they constantly engage in the suppression of their personal preferences and aspirations.
The chronic focus on meeting others’ needs at the expense of personal health and desires leads to emotional exhaustion and burnout.
Recognizing the signs of burnout is critical for people pleasers.
Seeking professional help such as coaching or counseling can provide effective strategies for managing stress and preventing burnout.
People Pleasers can take proactive steps to break the cycle of burnout by finding a healthier balance between meeting others’ needs and prioritizing their own self-care and desires so that they can improve their health and wellness and sustain their healthy high performance.
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